Relationship 101

What is it about relationships that makes people do silly things? If you have to break your neck to get into a relationship, surely you will break your neck to stay in one. If you have to strive so hard to 'get' that person, surely the whole lifespan of your relationship will be in strife..? If you think your life depends solely on the success of your relationship, then it will. If after you have struggled, and fought, and tried too hard and bent over backwards and ended up in the relationship you thought you wanted, don't be too surprised it's full of hurt and pain and not one full day of happiness to write home about. A word for the ladies: it's NOT complicated, and it's not meant to be difficult, and it's not meant to be a struggle. You are not supposed to 'go after' a man, he is supposed to woo you, win you over, convince you. Let him do the hard work, let a man be a man. Don't do his job for him and then turn around and expect him to be a complete gentleman. If he hasn't asked for your hand in marriage (preferably with your consent, from your parents), put a ring on your finger and walk you down the aisle, he is NOT your husband. If you happen to be sharing your bed with him at this point, he is not even your man, you are nothing but his bedwarmer, a bedmate, private laundromat, personal chef and in my opinion, doormat. Welcome to your reality! Okay, so I am ranting... It's just that I've heard many a sob story in the past few weeks and it beats me to admit that the foolishness lies squarely at the ladies' doorsteps. Yes, I said it. They were not wise with their choices, and are paying dearly for it. With permission, I will disect the relationship(s) in detail in the next couple of days, so watch this space...

The kindness of strangers.

Sometimes in life, it's not the big gestures or the expensive gifts that touch your heart, it's the simple things. A smile from a random stranger on the bus could brighten up the darkest of days, and a 'thank you' or a 'please' when you least expect it, could really make you feel like a million bucks! I was on a trip recently, and the experience I had on the 7 hour flight was just too touching not to share.

Travelling with a young child can be challenging, no matter how pleasant or easygoing your little one is. Let me give you a brief description of what we looked like on the way to the airplane. I was toting my handbag, a diaper bag, and documents in one hand, baby and jacket and scarf in the other. Yes, I must have looked a sorry sight. Good thing is, the baby is a smiler and was attracting more than enough positive attention and we got help stashing our luggage in the overhead cabin. We were even offered more convenient seats in a different row, but that's a story for another day. Today, I want to focus on a lovely angel God sent our way, sat in the next row on the same aisle as us. As soon as we were settled into our new seats, I noticed she was smiling at us and smiled back. The plane started taxiing, then stopped due to some delay or the other and we were at a standstll for over 15minutes. Being that noone was allowed to get up because the 'fasten seatbelt' signs were on, she mouthed 'if you need any help at all, feel fre to ask' and I nodded and mouthed a 'thanks ever so much' back. At about the 12th minute, my otherwise agreeable baby exploded a number 2 in her diaper and needed changing, STAT. What to do? I started playing all the distractive games I could think of. None worked and the poor little one was getting more and more fussy and definitely agitated. The plane eventually took off, and I was looking round for a steward/stewardess or someone to mind the little one in the bassinet while I returned to our former seats to retrieve all our bags and jackets. None in sight. next thing I know, the lady in the next row was bending over us, and said 'honey, I am very happy to help if you need me. I can see you both are travelling alone, just ask me when you need help.' All I could say was THANK YOU! Then I explained the situation, and she gladly took the baby while I went off to get the bags. Throughtout the flight, she was an absolute doll. She would come over and just pick up the little one and walk across to her own seat and play all kinds of games, read to and generally entertain the little one. I was more than grateful!!!

When dinner was served, I just picked at it while I entertained the bay, even though i was starving. I noticed the lady finished her dinner and got up wit her tray, then walked towards the back of the aircraft. At the back of my mind, I was thinking 'typical of the elderly to be more than polite and well mannered' and didn't think much else of it. On return, she came over and said 'come on babycakes, let Mommy have her dinner so she can be strong enough for you' and took the baby across to her seat again. I was amazed, and grateful and ate as quickly as I could, and went back to claim my precious one. We played and played and then the lady came up to me to inform me she was about to go to sleep for a few hours. She asked if I would love to have a bathroom break before she nods off, and I must say even though I didn't feel like I needed the bathroom, I went anyway since I wasn't sure when next I would get the opportunity to do so. She sat with the little one till I came back, then went back to her seat and slept. We pretty much played till just beofre the flight landed and then both dozed briefly, but it was very relaxing. I have never travelled with a baby before, talkless of taking a long haul flight with one, and with each step we took closer to the plane, I could feel some anxiety rising in me but i just turned it over to God and trusted he would take control, and He did! He sent someone to be there for and support me and I don't think it would have been any different had I had a companion on this flight.

This little gesture of help from that dear lady made such a big difference to my experience on this journey, and to my life in general. it may seem like nothing, and to her I am sure it was, but to me it made all the difference. I could have had a totally different experience and be completely worn out on arrival, but I thank God for little mercies. A random act of kindness by a total stranger sure made my day that much more enjoyable. Remember, it's the little things that matter!